My observation for this week's blog was completed at a local park. I observed a mom and her young daughter while having a fun day of play. They were with a group of other moms and children. The young girl kept coming over to the mom and asking her something, but the mother was not paying her very much attention. I noticed the mom kinda try to nod her head and send the child back out to play. As the child left, the mother would pick up her conversation with the other moms. In a few minutes, the child would return trying once again to get her mother's attention. Again, the mother tried to occupy her and send her off to play. The child got frustrated and stomped her feet and threw up her hands as she walked away. A short time passed and the child returned. Only this time she became extremely frustrated when ignored by her mom, and she began crying and yelling. This time the mother had no choice but to pay attention to the little girl. After calming her down, she realized that the little girl wanted to show her something. There was a really big ant hill over by the huge sand box and some of the other kids were messing with it.
After making this observation, it made me think about the times that I may have treated my own children in this same way. Many people think listening is so simple, yet it is easy for listening to become just other task (Stephenson, 2009). The mom could have made this example of communication more effective by stopping her conversation with the other moms, getting down eye level with the child, and let her know she was listening. After the child expressed her concern over the ant hill, she could have walked over with the child to help her solve the problem.
Because the mother ignored the child on several attempts of communication, she may have relayed the message that you are not as important as the ladies I am talking with. It caused the child feelings of frustration, anger, and hurt.
This observation made me stop and think about the way I communicate with my own children. There are times when I feel as though I may ignore my children when busy doing something else. I think it would be more effective to stop what I am doing and explain to my child why I am not able to give him my undivided attention. Also, let him know that as soon as I finish the task at hand I will make sure to listen to him. This explanation may save me several additional interruptions and avoid frustration from both parties!
Reference:
Stephenson, A. (2009). Conversations with a 2-year-old. YC: Young Children, 64(2), 90–95. Retrieved from the Walden Library using the Education Research Complete database. http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=ehh&AN=37131016&site=ehost-live&scope=site
Tabitha,
ReplyDeleteWhen communicating with children, we all have been guilty of not listening properly. I am glad we had to complete this assignment for observing effective communication with children. From reading your blog, I know now ignoring a child is not going to help the communication situation get better. I was glad to see that the mother took time to go see what the child wanted her to see. Listening is very important when communicating with children.
HI Tabitha. I also had the opportunity to visit the park this week. I really loved the examples that you listed on what could have been done differently. Too often, adults get caught up in their own conversations, that they accidentally ignore what is going on with their children. Little do they know that this could have a negative impact on the child's ability to communicate and self-esteem.
ReplyDeleteTabitha,
ReplyDeleteLike you I observed the interactions of children and adults and I saw how the child was being ignored by the adult. This made the child feel as if she is not important. If we treat children in the same manner this can have an impact of their self -esteem because they will grow up feeling like that they are not significant enough because no one cared to listen to them. As educators we want to have meaningful and positive relationship with our children so it is important that we listen and be respectful to others.