My husband and I recently had a disagreement on our Christmas budget. In my opinion, he would spend twice as much on our children as I would. Yes, I know that sounds weird; however, I come from a family of seven children and material possessions were limited. Don't get me wrong, I love to buy for my babies, and I feel they get more than enough on Christmas and birthdays, but if I left it up to my husband, they would get even more. It is extremely important to me that my children understand that they are blessed and that some children are not as privileged as they are. We both want to raise our children to give to those less fortunate, so why not buy a little less for our children, and give a little more to children who will not get any Christmas.
We used a few strategies during this discussion that were important to help us come to an agreement on how we wanted to spend our money on Christmas this year. First, we both shared our ideas and we both had to use effective listening. Interrupting and getting upset was not going to help the situation. After listening to both sides, we decided that we would compromise and make a list of things that each of us wanted to get the kids. This list included gifts that we both wanted them to have and a few gifts for the whole family. We then discussed how much we would spend on each angel that we picked from the tree at church. At the end of our discussion, I felt that we got a lot accomplished and that both our children and the other children would benefit from effective communication in the Krueger household. I was a happy lady!
Tabitha,
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely story!! Sounds like everyone got a bit of what they wanted and gave up a few of their wants in the end. A very good compromise situation.
Tabitha,
ReplyDeleteYou provided a great example of a compromise situation, everyone seemed to get what they wanted while giving up some.
This was truly a win-win situation
I agree with you that interruptions and getting upset doesn't get a conversation like this one anywhere. I have been married for 12 years and we still have these kinds of disagreements. The path that you two choose to take was great and seems to work for us as well when discussing money. Kudos to you and your husband for finding ground that both of you could express your ideas.
ReplyDeleteTabitha,
ReplyDeleteI like your strategy of writing down what was important to each of you. This is a great way of making sure that each is understood while at the same time getting their needs met. It can be challenging when two people disagree, especially in a marriage or committed relationship. This example was helpful to me because I will also use this method of communicating and compromise with my husband. Thanks for sharing.